This Friday will mark the end of week 19 of my pregnancy, nearly halfway! In some ways, it feels like I have been pregnant for a lot longer than the number nineteen sounds, especially out of the number forty, which still sounds like a long way off. At the same time, I feel like January is already rushing at me full speed ahead.
There are times, like in the morning, when I think my stomach doesn't look very pregnant yet. And then there are the evening times when it sticks out much more noticeably. I have also gotten two pregnancy comments from total strangers which means that the bump is getting more obviously baby-shaped and not just beer belly shaped.
People always say that the body knows what it's doing the second time around and that things just look bigger faster. I haven't noticed that so much with my belly but I have noticed some other parts of my body doing that. Like my thighs. And my butt. This time around, the weight seems to be distributing itself all around my middle section from my boobs to my knees, not just the belly. Yes, fear is gripping my heart that I will end up looking like a small cow by the end of the second half of this pregnancy.
But... I am going to the gym and trying my best to eat well. Which brings me to another thing that is happening sooner than last time - eating all the time. The past two days have been especially crazy; I eat and eat and eat and feel like there is a hole in my stomach that just will not fill up! I just feel hungry. I can't not eat when I get that feeling, but did I mention my thighs?! Sigh... oh well. The things we mothers do for our children.
And heartburn.... way earlier than I remember it starting last time around.
Really, though, these are minor pregnancy issues that just happen during this process. I have no real complaints. Some people say that for their second (or subsequent) pregnancies they sometimes even forget they're pregnant and don't pay as much attention. I understand that, but it's not true for me. I am aware every day (most of the time) that I am pregnant (and it's not just the thighs...). I look around and see other pregnant women and am so very grateful that I am where I am at this point. I am, again, honoured to be growing another being within me. Someone who will come out as his or her own very unique, perfect being.
All I want is for the rest of this pregnancy to be uneventful and healthy. I can't say that I'm as relaxed about everything this time around as I was with Jacob, armed with more knowledge and experience and stories at this point. However, I can say that I am enjoying it, growing pains and all. Being a woman has its challenges but it also has its rewards; I think of this as one of them.