February. As it got closer and closer, I started wondering what I was going to do for my February goal. There are so many contenders, really: crafting, writing, organizing, more nature, cooking, breadmaking, photography. Organizing almost won out. Not having a spot set up properly can deter me from getting into something, for sure. But as I sat with all these and made some space for what I need, a thought came to me.
Just do it.
Not to steal from Nike's logo. But there is something simple and direct about that line. It's a good mantra. I get myself so wrapped up in the planning of something or the organizing of it or making lists for it or getting inspired to do it or whatever that I don't actually get to the doing part of it. And that's the fun part, after all.
This trend within myself bothers me for a few reasons. First, I see these same characteristics in my father, and they totally drive me crazy when I see them in him. Oh, how we are all destined to become our parents. Unless we take charge! Which is what I hope this month helps me do. Second, I really just want to be doing more of the things I've been thinking of doing. And lastly, there is probably something deeper within me (there usually is) that is making me procrastinate. I think the planning and organizing are really just distractions from something else. Maybe it's spending money on things for my projects. Maybe it's not knowing how to do a project. Maybe it's not wanting to start something that will take an unknown amount of time to finish (which is particularly annoying when that project sits at the dining room table for said amount of time). Maybe it's realizing that I can't do everything I want to. It's easier to keep it in my head because there is more room for it there than in reality. Whatever the reason, I want to push it into coming forward.
I'm not sure how this will go. Just like last month, it's an experiment. It could look very different in the middle or the end of the month. But I'm going to try to just do what it is I want to do. Not get so sidelined by the details of how and just tackle it. The how will work itself out.