There is one thing that is unforgettable, though, and that is the day this being came into our world. That first-time haze of infanthood surrounds some of my memories, to be sure. But there are some things that are so clear: his super tiny body against mine, his little lips open in an "o" that I loved to kiss, swaddling him as tightly as I could so he would (maybe...) stay asleep longer, being up at odd hours at night thinking I was going to lose my mind.
|Daddy and Jacob - five years ago|
Memory is such an interesting thing. I remember times when he'd fall asleep in my arms, and I would just hold him. I knew there were other things I could be doing, but I also knew that these moments were more important and fleeting. So I would just hold him. I kiss him so many times a day I wonder how he still has skin on his cheeks. I smell him, touch him, hold him, listen to his voice and his words and his thoughts. And yet, memories fade. Do I really remember what he sounded like at 2 when he was working on his first sentences? Do I remember that baby smell he had?
It's so important to live in the moment because that's really all you have. I am glad to have the memories that I do because I was present then. So now, even if just for awhile, I can relive some of them. Being a parent is like nothing else in the world. And I love it.
|A new marble track!|
|Martha, Jesse, Annie, Jacob and Ander|
|Flourless chocolate cake.... his request. He has good taste.|